It can feel overwhelming to jump back in the dating pool and start dating again as a single mom. Once you are ready to test the waters, it can be useful to prepare yourself with these tips to ensure your experience goes as smoothly as possible.
1. Take It Slow
Perhaps one of the most important tips is to take any new relationship slowly. When you are a parent, you need to think about who you are bringing around your children, not just yourself. There’s never a need to rush into something.
2. Wait to Introduce Your Kids
Protecting your children, both physically and emotionally, should be your top priority. Because children easily attach to other adults, it is best to wait to introduce them until your relationship has a good chance of lasting for a long time. Don’t wait until you are ready to get married or move in together, but don’t rush things either.
3. Pay Attention to Red Flags
Most men who aren’t trustworthy will put up red flags if you watch for them. Pay particular attention to any traits that are similar to your ex. You won’t be successful with finding a new man if you fall for someone who is just like your ex.
4. Do Things for Yourself
A new dating relationship can be exciting and can lead to wanting to spend all your free time together. However, as a single mom, it is important to do things for yourself. Spend time participating in hobbies you enjoy, as well as spending time with your children and your new man separately.
5. Get to Know Each Other
While talking about past relationships is part of getting to know each other, these conversations should wait until the relationship is more established. Talk about who you are and what you like or don’t like.
Bad-mouthing an ex can be a major turn off and may even be a red flag, especially early in the relationship.
6. Make a List
As you consider your dating prospects, it can become overwhelming to decide who to go out on a date with. You can make this process easier by making a list.
Create a column that lists what you must have in a man, what you don’t want and what is negotiable. Use this guide to decide which date offers to accept.
7. Date for Fun
You don’t have to date for the sole purpose of finding that special someone. Take some time to just hang out with different men and have some fun. Online dating could be worth a shot. As long as you are safe, there’s no harm in just having fun.
Who knows? You may even stumble upon the right one in the process.
8. Don’t Let a Man Pressure You
It is important for single mothers to set the timeline when it comes to dating.
If the man you are dating is pushing for you to introduce him to your kids, move in together or anything else with which you aren’t comfortable, don’t be afraid to say no, even if it means losing him.
9. Always Be Honest
One of the biggest questions women have is whether they should reveal they have children. While children shouldn’t be the center of your dating relationship, it is important to be honest. Some men don’t want to date a single mom, and you should respect that.
10. You and Your Children Deserve Respect
Any man who isn’t willing to show you respect isn’t worth your time. However, when you have children, he should also respect them, especially after they meet for the first time. If the child is uncomfortable, he has to be willing to back off for a little while.
11. Introduce Your New Man Slowly
When the time comes to introduce your new man to your children, do so slowly and on their terms. Consider going on a family date so everyone is in neutral territory. If everything goes well, you can start doing things together more often. However, remember that your children need your attention too.
12. Keep Your Priorities in Check
In the thrill of a new relationship, it can be easy to put your new man first. As you date, you need to focus on putting your children first. If a school event interferes with date night, reschedule the date. Any man who doesn’t understand is not worth your attention.
13. Don’t Give Up
If you don’t find the right man on the first try, don’t give up. It takes time to find the right match, especially when you have children. You will be grateful that you waited once you find the perfect man for you and your children.